The Power of Presence
Here’s an excerpt from this month’s Hamilton Neurofeedback Newsletter (which you can sign up for here):
Therapeutic breakthroughs are rarely straightforward. They start with awkward silences, small talk, or stories that feel off-topic (until they don't).
As a student therapist, I'm learning that these sideways conversations often appear right before clients touch something uncomfortable and important. My job, then, is to meet clients with presence in these moments.
Presence means really listening, even when the client is 'talking around' the thing they most need to say. It means holding in mind both the clients' goals and my goals as their therapist. It means paying attention to the third party in the room: the relationship between us.
When I'm able to be present in this way — non-judgemental, patient, and attuned to the 'movement' in the conversation — something shifts. Everyone settles, the pressure to get it right goes away, and the session begins to 'click.' Meeting scattered clients with this caring, warmth, and attentiveness helps them be present with themselves, which on its own can be therapeutic.
The cool part? The NeurOptimal® Neurofeedback system we use at Hamilton Neurofeedback does the same thing. It mirrors your brain back to you without judgment or instruction. It helps you notice, self-correct, and become more present within yourself.
This skill isn’t just for the therapy room. Presence is how you stay grounded when your kid’s having a meltdown. It’s how you maintain your sanity in Toronto traffic. It’s how you notice that you’re anxious before your day derails.
And, if presence feels out of reach — if your mind is racing, numb, or just worn down — neurofeedback can help you get back there. Because whether it comes through therapy, meditation, prayer, interpretive dance, or brain training: presence is power.
Bonus: an excerpt from last month’s Newsletter on Avoidance:
I recently started providing Psychotherapy as a part of my Master's Degree. One of the things I've noticed is the role that avoidance plays in maintaining my clients suffering.
Intuitively, avoidance means avoiding doing something you don't want to do. The upside? It's a guaranteed way to stay comfortable. The downside? This comfort carries the cost of not bettering your life long-term. Avoidance can be benign, like choosing not to do the dishes, resulting in a messy kitchen. But avoidance can also be deeply consequential, like choosing not to chase your dreams, resulting in a regretful, unlived life.
It might come as no surprise that a lot of mental health challenges are caused and maintained through avoidance: social anxiety involves avoidance of judgement, OCD can involve the avoidance of dirt or germs, and PTSD involves the avoidance of triggers. The list goes on.
Naturally, I've also been reflecting on the role of neurofeedback in overcoming avoidance. The enhanced emotional stability, reduced impact of stress, and increased ability to lean into discomfort mean that neurofeedback can help clients choose to confront what they'd been avoiding.
Perhaps this is why — for many clients — the positive changes they experience continue to develop well after they finish their last session. Neurofeedback helps you become the kind of person who is able to overcome avoidance.
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